I had to do the darn pirate thing because all the cool kids were doing it.

My pirate name is "Captain Bess Flint." Which works for me--Elizabeth and all its derivitaves being among the best girls' names ever.

"Even though there's no legal rank on a pirate ship, everyone recognizes you're the one in charge. Like the rock flint, you're hard and sharp. But, also like flint, you're easily chipped, and sparky. Arr!"

(I don't really hate anyone.)

Oh, and I did those last-minute edits and sent the article back today. And then got started on some other crap. Yay me!