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Friday, October 01, 2004

wad some Pow'r the giftie gie us

Today I ran into my colleague "Hooker Boots" (I can't find out where I originally posted this, but he's the guy who complimented my "hooker boots" in a meeting once. I like him a lot), I mentioned that so far this year I haven't seen my dream job posted (since I like him, I've told him in confidence that I'm looking). I had a crisis about it, and started trying to talk myself into applying for non-dream jobs, before giving myself a mental smack and reminding myself that moving just for the sake of moving isn't going to fix anything. Stick to the plan: look for the perfect job, and if it doesn't come up, hang out here until it does, or until I decide I can deal with this place after all (i.e., by moving to Big City and commuting), or until I decide that since I can't find an academic job where I want to be and I'm not willing to stay here, I need to look for a different type of job.

So anyway, we were talking about different kinds of jobs and whether or not we'd apply at X State or Y College, and Hooker Boots said, "oh, there's no way you could teach at X state. You're too much of a researcher."

And I went HUH??? Because that's not what I thought when I applied for this job. But then I realized yeah, my primary focus the last year has really been on my research (not that I've neglected my teaching), and my big time struggle is all about finding space to write (which I'm very bad at). And I told Hooker Boots this, and he said, "come on, you've done A and B while I was just managing to get adjusted and find out where the cafeteria is." And I realized that I was holding in my hand as we spoke the final copy of this damn grant application I've been bitching about on and off for the last month or so, and that I actually really want the money because I don't know how I'll write the book without it.

It was weird, that little moment of having someone state something as if it were patently obvious, when you've never seen it yourself.

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14 Feb 2001 09:00:00 UTC-0400


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Some of my better bitching

Welcome New Readers
Ultimate Bra Post part I
Ultimate Bra Post part II
Abortion
Planned Parenthood
Do You Trust Women?
Feminisms (including my own)
Feminism 101 (why children are not a lifestyle choice)
Misogyny In Real Life (be sure and check out the comment thread)
Moms At Work--Over There
Professor Mama
My Other Mom
Moms in the Academy

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